My Story

It's The Little Victories (as published on RecoveryWarriors.com)

It's The Little Victories (as published on RecoveryWarriors.com)

I was so ashamed of my body in that time of my life.

I was absolutely certain that others were constantly judging me based on what my body looked like and was terrified that if they knew that I shopped at the plus sized stores, that would somehow justify this imaginary judgement.

So, standing at the cash register in the clothes store, I would whip out a wrinkly, beat up plastic Safeway shopping bag (or two) from my purse and insist that the woman serving me put my new clothes into that rather than a bag from under her counter.

A Middle Aged Eating Disorder Story

I'm a middle aged woman in recovery from an eating disorder. This is the nuts and bolts of my story.

Click the image to watch the video

Click the image to watch the video

There is a unique layer of shame for people with eating disorders as they age beyond what we typically see portrayed in the media as the "eating disorder type". Because society has trained us all to believe that wisdom comes with age, it is quite difficult for someone over the age of 35 or 40 years old to acknowledge an eating disorder exists, let alone seek treatment.

Eating disorders also have the second highest mortality rate of all mental illnesses.

That's a dangerous combination.

In this video, I talk about what I know so far about how I developed binge eating disorder. If you are struggling with your relationship with food, exercise, or body image, I hope that hearing my story will help you find the courage to get really curious about yourself and find a way to heal.

If you struggle with an eating disorder and would like some help getting started with Creative Journaling to work through some of your challenges, consider joining me in my Creative Journaling for Recovery group on Facebook. We meet every day to journal, get creative and support one another.

Sign Up Here

More resources for anyone looking for more guidance or help with an eating disorder or disordered eating behaviors:

National Eating Disorder Association (USA)

National Eating Disorder Information Centre (CANADA)

Recovery Warriors

Project Heal (USA)

It's National Wellness Month - why am I so furious??

Click my face to get the whole story!

Click my face to get the whole story!

What does wellness mean?

My idea of wellness has changed too many times to count in my lifetime. I'm no longer a spring chicken, so there have been loads of opportunities for me to adopt new ideas of wellness.

I remember when skinny = wellness 🌱

I remember when lean + muscular = wellness 🌱

And then there's now and healthy body + healthy mind = wellness 🌱

My journey from then to now has been long, winding and painful. It has culminated in my failing mental health and the discovery that I have an eating disorder.

But I can be grateful for having so many experiences to learn from so that NOW I can work towards wellness in a whole new way and understand where happiness fits into the equation.

I'll tell you some things that I know for certain in this video, like that fact that there is no real way to measure wellness. I'll also share with you some very aggrivated thoughts about the reboot of a once popular weight loss tv show.

... that part will be a wonderful opportunity for us all to practice our deep cleansing breaths.

📲

When you're through watching this video, why not have a look at my book The Reflections Journal? It's full of activities to help you stay consistent in your journaling practice as you work through recovery. It helped me more than I could have imagined, and it might just be the thing you need too!